RPT Newsletter #010 | Romance In Games - It's The Chase That's Fun

[Stephan Hornick]

Romance In Games - It's The Chase That's Fun
From JohnnFour | updated February 21, 2019

Roleplaying Tips Newsletter #010

I had the opportunity to have a very enjoyable roleplaying discussion with a few Roleplaying Tips Weekly subscribers this past weekend. And the topic of character romance in games came up. I put in my 2 cents worth and absorbed all I could. Here is a brief review of what was said and some tips for handling romance in your own campaign.

It was agreed by all that romance can be a great addition to a roleplaying campaign. It allows new conflicts and story lines, new types of NPCs and fun interactions. But there are good and bad ways to deal with it.

If the situation just devolves into sex, then just roll a dice and get on with the story. If the player wants to explore a fantasy of this nature then draw the line and give that person a 1-900 number to call–then get your game back on track.

Roleplaying romance, in my opinion, is just like a treasure hunt. And just as rewarding. The fun is in the chase and the challenges along the way. When I think of romance, I conjure up images of Victorian times where society put a large number of restrictions upon acceptable relationships between men and women. And this is where the fun and challenge lies.

It’s one thing to have a goopy conversation between lovers, but it’s quite another to try to win some “alone time” with a another, protect reputations, prove your worthiness as a suitor, be polite and unoffensive, win over the parents-in-law, gain community acceptance, and find a truly compatible partner.

Imagine a scene where the player must figure out how to pass a secret note to someone they are attracted to in order to arrange a meeting. Then the party must act as a team to protect the two during the meeting from being discovered. As a GM you can probably think of many wrenches to put into those plans.

And then, after the meeting, what will happen when the two meet in public–at a party for example. They must act as if the secret meeting never occurred or raise suspicion. Yet they really did have that meeting and will feel compelled to converse intimately instead of as strangers. A true roleplaying challenge!

And what about the lady’s father? What if he’s a 19th level paladin? Ouch.

And think about this. If a person who bristled with weapons, smelled like an orc and had some kind of dungeon-crawling, treasure seeking deathwish came up to you and asked your hand in marriage, would you accept? And get a load of their name. Would you want to be known as Mr. or Mrs. Thromgar The Barbarian?

As you can see, romance can become a very complex and entertaining endeavour in your games.

For your campaign, think of the Victorians and come up with a few social rules that govern (and restrict) relationships between men and women, dwarves and elves, etc. What kind of social roadblocks does your society have that would make romance like an exciting treasure hunt?

And as I said, if things should progress beyond conversation, just roll a dice and get on with it. It’s the chase that counts.

What kind of challenges do you face when considering romance for your campaign? Perhaps I, or other readers, can help.

 

[Stephan Hornick]

From David Sacré:

Agreed. I often give my players nice NPCs as companions that I call 2PC (well it doesn’t really work in English but it does in French ). Meaning they’re not player characters but somehow nearly. I handle them most of the time but the PCs have access to their sheets and often roll for them.

I like to induce some romance with those 2PCs and the PCs. I usually do not need to do anything, it happens naturally as the players usually can’t help wanting it…

It adds sometimes some competition amongst them as well as roleplaying reaction (I like when a player will play according to his role and not to gain some stats/loot. Even better if helping the poor lady will actually have a bad consequence for the player and he knows it).

You want those lovers to be hard to get in order for players to feel some kind of accomplishement (needs a lot of gaming sessions). It will also help to add some depth to the game as the player adds some weaknesses (see how Keyser Söze kills his family to counteract that).

It’s nevertheless a bit awkward to do as it requires a lot of acting for a big bearded man behind a screen to sound like the cute little busty elf that your friend (equally big bearded dude) is romancing…

In fantasy games, romance is often neglected and I bet that many players will be lost during the crime investigation part of your campaign if the motives for the murderer is plain jealousy…

Cheers !

 

[Stephan Hornick]

Romance? Great topic, Johnn.
I think, you need the right players and GM to see this through. Once, I actually had this.
I find, there are several types of players when it comes to romance.

• Mr. Cool: "I want to have sex with that NPC. My PC has a Charisma of 22!"
  I find there are many young or inexperienced players, who just want to feel overwhelming. High stats give them pleasure. And they try to use them for situations they normally fail at in real life. And it is too obvious. They beam when they "succeed".
• Mr. Oblivious: "What? Why is she looking at me? Her hand on my knees? I grab my purse!"
  Do you remember those instances you tried to allude to a possibility and alluded more and more until it became so obvious that you even felt worse about it, but the player didn't get it? At all. These players are also inexperienced, I think. Worse, if they tell you as a player that they would actually love to have a romance relationship with a specific NPC...
• Mr. Eternal Virgin: "I'm a god-fearing priest! Of course, I will never succumb to any attractions."
  It is hard to tell with these players, why they strictly forbid romance in the game for their characters. Either they themselves feel uncomfortable about it (a valid reason), or they play their PC to an extreme template, not allowing the PC to have any interest in the other (or same) sex, only because they chose the class of priest/cleric/paladin. Wouldn't it be even more interesting if that character actually felt the interest but was under a vow of chastice? THAT would be roleplaying a dilemma. But without a dilemma, it is no roleplaying (my 2ct.).
• Mr. Flirty: "Of course, my lady, I could tell you about our recent fight with a troll, but that would take too long."
  Some players actually are interested in the NPCs and their motives! They play along, but only to a certain degree. Then they break the contact and even forget that NPC. I'm always teased to believe that this is the one player, who might actually go all the way towards a real romance story... but then my fantasies how to evolve this great side story get dumped cold.
• Mr. Romance: "Of course, my lady. I will tell you about my adventures and how we fought an ugly troll. But only after you tell me your name, that must be as beautiful as yourself."
  Now that player is rare, I believe. A player, who is into the role and beyond, teasing and actually wanting it to be a long path with ups and downs of romance. It is the little things, that matter. Fine gazes, touches, or even better: no touches, the words, allusions, etiquette and rank... this player is actually aware of those fine mechanics.

So, this is my box system for players, but of course there are many more and it is not intended as a criticism. Also, I find it very much depends on the group itself and what they enjoy and how much focus is laid on the current plot and whether side plots as such as romance is acceptable for all players.

So, on with it: Once, I had a player, who noticed the little things and got interested in a barmaid. The character a bard with fleeting interests and many bed-side stories. But this time, he didn't just jest and got her all fallen for him, but meant it. It was a slow story and they met several times before he even tried to convey his feelings. And there was this often drunken city guard who was in love with her since their childhood. And there had already been a rivalry between the city guard and the bard, who was once found to be stealing. The bard accepted missions from the girl's parents for free and the whole party of adventurers cheered him on. He met the aunt and didn't like her, and the grandmother who didn't like him. He tried to buy in with favors and presents. But then, the city guard was about to propose to her and the bard had noticed beforehand. He stole the ring from the city guard's apartement and made the proposal himself, out of spite. And with this reason, here was the twist by the player. I loved it! The city guard actually rose and called the bard a lier, even attacked him and got a good punch to meet the bard's face. Then, it was decided. Although the barmaid was surprised by the city guard's actions, she scolded him for attacking her dear bard. She cared for him in the back chamber and then, finally alone, they kissed for the first time. The long wait for this to happen made it a magical moment.
Alas, it didn't hold very long. As the accusation still echoed within her mind, the barmaid became wary where the bard was getting all the beautiful things he gave her. And then she caught him in a lie and he had indeed stole that ring. He was only playing with her, she accused him. And she was not entirely wrong. Finally, her parents set an ultimatum: Either marry her or stop this nonsense. And he actually agreed to marry her. They planned the date and... and then he HAD to go onto an adventure. And another. He delayed. And then, it became clear: The bard was a man of the road and didn't want to be encaged by marriage.
Even though they never married, it was a great side plot and I loved it dearly. Don't tell my players, but I loved it even more than the main plot.

 

[Stephan Hornick]

@JochenL : Sorry, I added another poll choice at the correct position. Could you please re-allocate your choice?